


This Is Not The End

by Sashikiyuu



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-23
Updated: 2020-05-23
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:47:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24333850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sashikiyuu/pseuds/Sashikiyuu
Summary: God, please listen to my prayers on this one. I am begging you. Please protect him.
Relationships: America/England (Hetalia)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 22





	This Is Not The End

**Author's Note:**

> **Written in Arthur's P.O.V. Grammar error(s).**
> 
> **Enjoy reading!**

The world may be destroyed. But God, please don't do that to me and him.

I didn't know anything, really. Why did the world felt so hostile to each other? I could not bring my weak body into battle, even merely holding a weapon or walking for miles. I have no muscular body, my gut still tiny and my heart also that weakly. Trust me, but I am not that skinny.

A home is a place that I think safer than any other place right now. I love my house, _we_ love this tiny house who barely had no neighbors and far from the hustle of the city.

Farming is a good idea, and I did it. But it was not that long. I should have done it together with him who is ready to leave me alone.

"Where did you put my letter, Arthur?"

Hearing his voice, my daydream to living forever in this house together with him broken immediately. It was a lie if I say that I didn't know about the letter. Honestly though, I really want to hide that nasty letter, or throw it, or even burn it because that is the way to keep him from not going to war. But I can not do that because the world needs him, so I just put a fake smile at him. "It's on the table in our room. I put it there. "

Alfred left me standing in front of the closing door and returned to our room to get his valuable paper. When he returned, I really could not look at him. He was even that neat with the military uniform he was wearing and Alfred looks so handsome today. But alas, my heart was not that strong to bearing pain. I deliberately stood at the door so he that he realized what I want, but unfortunately Alfred has always been oblivious.

"How do I look?" he asked, still in a cheerful tone. I began to think if he really was ready with all this and act like nothing happened. But I guess he was not that cruel to me, he definitely knew my feelings on this.

I nodded slightly and still trying to smile. "Perfect," the sight in front of me was indeed felt like heaven. I want to hold him tight, smelling on his body, and felt his warmth. On the other hand, I want to thank someone who gave Alfred that uniform, because he really is very handsome. But on the other hand, even he look enchanting to me, it was still heartbreaking to see.

Alfred chuckles. "Thank you."

Silent fell, none of both of us speak. I know Alfred still in front of me, standing right there like waiting for something. But I am not willing to open a conversation.

"Hey, are you still mad at me?" he asked.

I still remember my selfish words last night when I told him to leave from here, we both went together to a place that no one eyes could saw us. Just the two of us and everything will be fine. But he was really stubborn and there was nothing I can do, and I still love him that much.

I shook my head with no expression.

"Forgive me," he said finally.

I gulped and ventured to say something. "What time they pick you up?" I said, even though my voice sounded a bit hoarse but it's okay. I stared at the man in front of me and I can see that Alfred's face fell, he looked sad. I don't like to look at him with that face. It's just the same as if my heart was torn by his expression. Please, stop.

"Maybe soon," Alfred said. He looked at me who was staring down. "I know this is difficult, but believe me. I promise you that I will return to this home. To our home."

Nonsense.

If you don't come back, what should I do?

He pulled one of my hands and kissed it briefly. "I love you."

The tears that I was holding back finally broke hearing his genuine words. He _is_ really that cruel. "Is that all you want to say right now?"

Alfred looked at me with a bit surprised. Of course, my tears. He was clammed up. His words actually hurt me, and I am tired of begging.

"Al, give me a chance to beg to you," I sobbed as the liquid that came out from my eyes raced down to my cheeks. "I'm begging you for the last time—" I swallowed hard, and I was not ready for my next words. I am afraid of rejection. Rejected is hurt without mercy. It will not bleed but it can make my heart stop for a moment, and that was very suffocating.

I know it is impossible if he changed his mind.

I looked at him with a sorrowful look. "Please, don't leave me alone."

I could see my favorite blue eyes were also glazed. God, please just let me cry over all of this, don't him.

"I don't want you to leave. I'm scared. I'm not ready. I still want to be with you, Al. I—" It was a surprise. My speech was interrupted by a perfect hug. It felt so warm, so comfortable that my tears were getting worse. It felt so right that I forgot that we were both sinners, and I don't want to let go of this hug.

I hate this feeling.

"Forgive me, Arthur." that's all coming out of his mouth, begging to me for forgiveness when I beg him to stay with me. His hug is getting tighter and there was no reason for me to hate it. And this comfort, will God also take it from me?

"I love you." finally I dare to say it. It should be a relief, but why is it still suffocating me? This ignorance that enveloped me making me now completely down.

"Yes, I know. I love you, too." Alfred said softly, whispering to my ear. "I love you more than anything in this world."

Today God really has no empathy for me. It felt like dying just to hear it. His soft voice sounded beautiful, and Alfred is someone who poisoned me. What kind of poison he gave to me and succeed to make me hard to forget him, I don't know. We are the same, we both humans. But why in my eyes he was such a beautiful figure?

He was like an angel in the midst of world disasters.

Alfred kissed me gently and our lips are adrift. The sensation is poisonous; I can not let go. His hand gripped my arm, and I felt helpless. My wastefully tears won't stop, even though I was tired of crying like this today. Yesterday was the worst. I hope there are still tears left in my eyes when welcoming him home later, or the opposite.

The day he will never return.

_He did not return?_

My eyes widening and he was surprised. Our kiss was broken; I broke it. I breathe as much air as possible when suddenly my mind show things that I don't want to think about. "Alfred!" I shouted, calling his name.

"Yes, I'm here."

The voice is still there. He is still in front of me, but it did not last long.

"Alfred. Alfred. Alfred. Alfred. Alfred. Alfred," I may not be able to heal the wounds in my heart. My mind filled with his figures, my tears had leaked again. Because that one thought, I am not ready to accept it.

_God, why?_

Alfred smiled, his sincere smile. "I'm here, Arthur," he said softly.

It felt stupid. Crazy because love did not make sense, but people say that the feeling of love can defeat our common sense in crazy ways. If today was a normal day, maybe he would make fun of me because I was whiny, crying all day. But I don't care. It was something that I can not whine about it. What does a world mean without him?

_...why you brought me a creature as beautiful as him?_

"Hey, look at me," Alfred said, looking at me who is like a crazy man. I keep calling his name. I try not to forget him, but his hand touched my cold cheek. It makes me inevitably stare into his cool blue eyes. Gosh, those eyes. Is there someone who has eyes as beautiful as him?

I shook my head.

"Arthur, I beg you," the sound of the car horn ahead sounded like a real nightmare. "I need you to do one thing for me."

I can not say. My legs went limp first. Dreams can not be as painful as this.

_...God, please listen to my prayers on this one._

"Arthur," he called my name again, and his damn smile did not quickly disappear either. Alfred stroking my cheek softly. "Please, smile at me."

His words might sound easy, but my lips actually felt speechless. I looked into his eyes, gathering all my strength to look every inch at his face; eyes, nose, lips, for the last time before he went. It was beautiful. The ceiling of our house and half its contents stared blankly at me with him and the door behind me was a silent witness to a love that may not be destined to be eternal.

_I'm begging you..._

I tried my best and smiled genuinely at him, even though my tears still dropping its liquid. "I love you, Alfred."

Alfred kissed me again and then released his hand from me. The kiss was brief but it turned out to be more comfortable than before. He carried the large bag in his hand and stepped forward. "Thank you," he said, looking at me his promising eyes."I promise I will return."

I just nodded, and the door finally opened. I still can not close the door. I still can not make Alfred to not step out with that military uniform. I am really that weak.

"This is not the end of everything, Arthur." He said to me for the last time until his back went away. Before he got into the car, he had a chance to wave his hand at me. I waved back slowly, still trying not to make this smile disappear for his sake.

The wheel goes away. I was still pensive in front, next to the red door, accepting the fate that someone I loved has left.

Alfred said that someday he would become a bird because he can fly, but now he cheated because he did not take me to see the same view in the sky together with him. I just chuckled when imagining his face telling that stories, and now it becomes real.

My eyes rose to looked at the sky. The sky was blue, similar to his eyes but not as beautiful as his. It was a bright sunny on this painful day. I don't want to be pitied even by the sky.

My heart and I ready to wait. Tomorrow, the next day, next week, next year, five years later even forever, I am ready to wait for him to return to our home. He promised me to come back, and he must be responsible for what he said.

I smiled sadly and convinced myself for the umpteenth time. "This is not the end of everything."

This could be a real beginning. The beginning of the love story between me and him; the insolent pilot and a wheat farmer who was selfish and wanted to be understood by him.

People say that love can defeat even our common sense. People also say that love could change the world and your life, but now I knew him and fell in love with a pilot who is ready to die.

_...please, protect him._

**.**

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**.**


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